The Third Wheel

The third wheel on a tricycle is important in order to balance a trike rider.  Stools can have three legs, with the third performing the same function as the wheel on a tricycle.  There is also another term for a third wheel, and it is often has a negative connotation--it is the person who hangs around with a couple, going to events with them.  The couple may refer to the addition of the person as a third wheel.  This could be most annoying at a younger age, particularly when a young couple is dating or newly married.  Although times are different now than they used so perhaps the third wheel, in terms of person is viewed differently.    I know about third wheels, because I was often one as a younbg adult. 

Wailing wall, part of former Jewish Temple

The idea of third wheel came to mind while recently watching the classic movie "Ben-Hur."  At the beginning of the movie there is a scene in the hamlet of Nazareth where a visitor to the carpentry shop asks why his table is not completed, a project the carpenter's son is supposed to complete.  The visitor then asks Joseph, the carpenter, where Joseph's son is.  To which Joseph replied in the hills.  The man asked why he is in the hills, to which Joseph noted his son said he is doing his father's work.  The visitor, of course, replies, that he should be here in his father's workshop finishing the table. While watching that scene it occurred to me that not only do I share some traits with Joseph, but he must have been the third wheel in the household.

Birth location of Jesus Christ

Today, March 19, is the feast day of St. Joseph.  In the United States it is a clear second fiddle to the feast day of St. Patrick on March 17.  Other than in some old Italian, or Polish neighborhoods in the United States there are no parades, there is no dying the river, there is no artificially colored beer. In some places the feast of St. Joseph is a holy day of obligation in the Roman Catholic Church, but in the United States it is not.  In the U.S. Joseph is, well, an afterthought.  Think what life must have been like for Joseph.

Sign noting location of Joseph's carpentry shop

The bible gives us very little information about Joseph.  We know he is of the house and lineage of David.  To think I have a hard time finding ancestor's beyond their time in the United States, and here Jewish oral tradition has Joseph back to King David.  Joseph is engaged to a woman who he then finds out is pregnant, and he is not the father.  This must have caused some great consternation in the community. The upstanding man he is decides to marry Mary, a decision to prevent her from being scorned.  He travels with her to Bethlehem for the census, having to find room in a manger, really a cave, due to no other lodging being available. He probably helped birth his son, but we don't know.  He is likely home when the three magi arrive after the birth of his stepson.  Sometime after the three magi arrive  he can't go back to Nazareth, instead the family has to sneak into Egypt to avoid their young son from being killed by a jealous King Herod.  While we all grew up knowing him as a carpenter, today some say he was more likely a day laborer and dabbled in a variety of tasks and odd jobs.

Looking southwest over Sea of Galilee

In addition, while his stepson was the son of God, the child certainly had his moments of rage, just like any normal person.  A prime example is the rage he had at the money changers in the temple.  His stepson also went to teach in the temple and did not even have the courtesy to tell his mother and stepfather where he was going so they had a moment of every parents worst nightmare.  Jesus, in the story of changing water into wine at Cana asks his mother, with what I take as some disdain:  "woman, why do you involve me?"  My goodness, if I had referred to my mother in that way, well let me say her look would have had me on the run.  He certainly did not appear to well honor his mother at that point.  Then of course there is the fact that Joseph's wife was specially picked by God.  Let us look at it from a practical sense: men seldom win an argument with their wife, so can you imagine what his arguments with the Blessed Virgin Mary were like?  But, perhaps, poor Joseph knew from the start any argument would be fruitless, so why bother.  On top of that how could he discipline God's offspring?

Jewish ritual bath, possibly in Joseph, Mary and Jesus' house

Joseph really does not seem to get much respect.  I am not sure how many siblings he had, but I cget the sense that he was probably a middle child.  In that way he was used to being the odd person out.  Kinda of the forgotten type.  While his stepson was away in the hill preparing for his short-lived ministry, Joseph toiled in his workshop, found the odd jobs to earn a few extra pieces of silver, and gathered the fire wood.  Joseph went about the daily routines that make up so much of human existence. In other words, Joseph's toil and labor for the benefit of the household was not unlike that of many Dad's today.

Stone water container, like the one used in miracle at Cana

To me the reason St. Joseph is special is his ordinariness.  Let's face it, but for raising the son of God he would not be a saint.  He did not chase the, apocryphal, snakes out of Ireland.  There is no record of him doing anything overly special (there is not much in the historical record on him at all).  I am sure he had his fits and rages, doubts and insecurities, triumphs and joys just like the rest of us.  In that we celebrate him as an ordinary man, placed in an unusual situation.  He may have been the third wheel in that Nazarene household over 2,000 years past, but I think that fit him just fine and he well recognized his lot in life--an ordinary person going about his daily duties, and providing some balance to an otherwise extraordinary household.

Painting in the Church of St. Joseph, Nazareth

Author photos, Spring 2013